Dark Triad Part 1: Narcissism
Part 1 of a Four Part Series
What is narcissism?
According to WebMD Narcissism is extreme self-involvement to the degree that it makes a person ignore the needs of those around them.
How does this affect a person?
A person with narcissistic personality disorder tends to be overly selfish and have a lack of empathy towards others. These types of people love admiration. They like to be the smartest person in the room while the others boast them up and fuel their ego.
This can be recognized in the person who often describes themselves almost like a god. It's mostly those people that claim to be things that others wouldn't outwardly say. Such as when people say "I'm the best one here."
It's not really that they are just self absorbed. It is more that these types of people NEED the praise to feel good about themselves. To a normal person it would be the equivalent of giving a homeless man money or helping a friend out as a favor. That same feeling of I did something good for someone I care about is often only felt by narcissists when they feel superior or praised for what they did or who they are.
Think of it like petting a dog and giving it a treat when it obeys your command to sit. The dog is happy.
In other words. They NEED to be liked, else they feel ostracized by those around them.
How Do You Identify A Narcissist?
Narcissists come across as arrogant and extremely self centered. You know that coworker that's always lurking and interjecting to override the conversation in their favor? Odds are they're a narcissist. They want the power of control over others. So by intercepting the conversation they can control it and take it where they want to go. Making themselves feel like the leader and most important which fuels their ego.
Another way is they're always demanding. They always want you to do something if they ask you. A form of power over you by continually asking you to keep doing something.
No I don't mean your boss who asks you to do your job. I mean the person who has you do little things and favors in which you wouldn't necessarily do yourself. This can be your superior or coworker who has you do parts of their job because they can or because you will.
They will also tend to brag about their accomplishments as if they are unique. It can even be simple things that you may even do but to them they believe they are special because they do these things and will overtly tell people without being asked.
Creating a narcissist.
Narcissism tends to develop during adolescence. According to healthline.com this can occur from abuse or neglect as a child.
When the parents abuse or neglect the child it can cause them to exaggerate themselves or look for praise in other ways.
In the abused child it is found that due to the lack of power at home they take as much as they can everywhere else.
In the neglected child it is found that they look to others to boost them up. They will hang with those they view as below them so the ones below them will make the neglected child feel important which they don't get at home.
Other ways narcissists are created come from helicopter parenting. Helicopter parenting can cause the child to feel trapped at home and in other certain situations. They strive for freedom or anything they can control to forget that as soon as they return to their parent(s) they become trapped again. So whenever they can take control they will and will do anything to keep it as long as they can.
How to deal with a narcissist.
First off. Learning to deal with a narcissist requires a basic understanding of what NPD (narcissistic personality disorder)actually is as well as how the ones affected with NPD actually act.
Which you should have a good understanding of both because you've read this far.
Another way to deal with people suffering from NPD is to just limit your interactions with them as much as you can.
One thing you can utilize is shame. Those with NPD lack empathy and guilt but you can shame them into your control.
Now that you've learned the effects, identifiers, development and how to deal with NPD we shall move onto part two of The Dark Triad Series where you will learn the effects, identifiers, development and ways to deal with Machiavellianism.
- Sir Galahad
The SASC Foundation
Social Anxiety Social Club
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